Posted by Lumbergh for MacGruber
Today the men of Ambush made the long 3,218,688 millimeter trek from Ambush to converge with the men of CAT. Anyone who reads this that can accurately guess the mileage in 3,218,688 millimeters gets a special prize. NO GOOGLE.
Conditions: The weather was weathery
Paper Jam told us about his bathroom story during SL from his run before he left for his and Juice’s Q at Arena. That guy can’t run without having to find a bush to poop behind.
1 minute warning
Disclaimer – Modifying was not allowed
Prayer – The spirit of the Lord was definitely with us after that master piece. I think I outdid Irrev, he better watch out. I may be coming for his job.
Started off right with a gift for Po – Slaughter Starter – 20 burpees
Mosey to the field on the track
TTT x 15
25 SSH IC followed by 4 merkins
20 SSH IC followed by 8 merkins
15 SSH IC followed by 12 merkins
10 SSH IC followed by 16 merkins
5 SSH IC followed by 20 merkins
30 LBAC’s forward and reverse. WHERE WAS METER? I tried to get him to lead this as it should be renamed the Meter but for that 3-minute span he was nowhere to be found. Maybe he pulled a Paper Jam……Who knows.
Now that our heart rates were elevated from 75 SSH’s and a few merkins we moseyed to the steps at the gym. Partner up with one partner saying at the bottom to complete repetitions of 15 merkins followed by 15 BBSU’s – rinse and repeat. While that was going on the other partner:
-Box jumped up one set of stairs, ran down the next set, boxed jump up on set of stairs….until the end. At that point the partners switched positions and well…..you get the idea.
Next set – partner at the bottom still did the same exercise however now the other partner had to do a “reverse bear crawl” UP the stairs and a forward bear crawl DOWN the stairs. This idea sounded much better in my head sitting on the couch with a Huger Street IPA last night. Make no mistake it sucked, and I only saw two pax actually complete the exercise. If you Q it you have to DO it so I made it through but it was awful. Probably will throw that idea in the trash can.
Head to the practice football field – split the pax into two groups that lined up behind a very large and heavy tractor tire. This worked similar to an Indian run (I’m sure all the liberals will call that racist). To start, the front line leader begins to flip the tire over heading 100 yards to the goal line. While that was happening, the entire line did napalms following the tire flipper. Once the man at the end of the line did 5 napalms, he ran to the front to relieve the tire flipper and handed his block to the tire flipper who began doing napalms with the rest of the line. This went for 100 yards to the goal line. For the 100 yards back the lines did overhead presses. My team won the race back but I’m not entirely sure the other team knew it was a competition, regardless we won – Suck It!
With only a matter of minutes remaining – and DS stating we didn’t have time b.c he had to be at work at 6 we did a MacGruber special ab workout. All pax in a tight circle on their 6. 10 leg raises and when complete hold legs up in the air. In a round robin fashion, each man ran around the circle and grabbed fellow pax’s legs and hurled them to the ground. The pax on the ground was not supposed to let his legs touch the ground but not many were successful. Thanks to Mercy Rule, Niles and Trickle for throwing my legs down with some aggression. I think that was their revenge for the reverse bear crawls.
Recover to the flag:
*Stop the swamp but the more important race is Jail Break
*Now is a great time to start training for the BRR
*SAFE Lexington meeting at Mt. Horeb Sunday – Be there.
FNG – He announced he was wearing DS’s shorts…I have no idea why. Works at diesel lap tops, likes to duck hunt, no embarrassing stories……
Until next time………