Twas the morning before Christmas, when all through Emily
Not a PAX was stirring, not even OC
The bricks and blocks were stored below the deck with care,
In hopes that Paperboy would not lead them there.
The boys were nestled all snug in their sacks,
While visions of Burpees messed with the PAX.
My M in her jammies and YHC in my tank,
Were plotting a fine beatdown while in low plank.
When out on the lawn arose such a ruckus,
I sprang from my bed and went for a look-us.
Away to the window I flew like a flash,
I thought someone was trying to rob my holiday stash.
The moon was near full and shone like a blinky,
Something felt off and rather quite stinky.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
Was a band of ruckers with Budweiser beer.
With a little old cadre, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it was Geoff that ol’ D***.
More rapid than Subby his orders came fast,
And he whistled and shouted, and called them half-assed!
“Now Stanza, now Fannie, now Beta, now Huffy!
On Beads, On Boris, On Jenny, and McMuffin!
To the top of the porch and through the front door,
We shall steal his Weinke, leave him crying on all fours!”
And then in a twinkling, I heard in the crib,
The prancing and preening of men oh so glib.
As I took in the scene and turned my head around,
There was Geoff looking unnaturally round.
He was dressed all in fur, from head to his foot,
His attire was all fuzzy, right down to his boot.
A bundle of coupons was slung over his back,
Resting quite nicely on top of his ruck sack.
His eyes, how beady, his hair extra scruffy.
His cheeks were all roses, cause his beard was so fluffy.
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
And I knew it was near time to give him a go.
The stump of his water hose was tight in his teeth,
His breath was stank beyond all belief.
He had a weathered face and a big ol fat belly,
The odor from his bottom was ever so smelly.
He was cunning and evil, a right nasty lil fellow,
I tried to laugh it off but I was softer than a marshmallow.
A wink of his eye and a cock of his head,
Soon gave me the feeling of impending dread.
He spoke not a word but went straight for my paper,
And ripped it front of me, he finished his caper!
And lay his hand upon the leash of his men,
With a subtle flick they shot outside once again!
He laughed so dreadful as they raced down the street,
Geoff had never seen failure, he’d never been beat!
But YHC was prepared, and yelled back at Geoff.
‘Merry Christmas you dumb SOB, on my phone it was left!’
In actual events, 13 PAX gathered for a time honored #Thunder tradition:
The 12 Days of Christmas.
Of course the PAX have made strides since the initial unveiling of this workout, and a 13th day was added last year. YHC knew the group was up for a 14th, but waitied to see how the workout panned out.
Conditions: Very Christmas-like, if you live in Costa Rica
The Thang:
The workout is very similar, there are 12 sets of exercises, and you perform each one to the tune of the song:
1st Day – Lap around the parking lot
2nd Day – 2 dozen merkins (who planned this day)
3rd Day – 3 Imp Walkers IC
4th Day – 4 Jungle Boi Squats
5th Day – 5 BURPEES PLEASE!!!!!!
6th Day – 6 inches for 30 seconds
7th Day – 7 Russian Twists IC
8th Day – 8 Jump Squats (what a lovely place to put these)
9th Day – 9 LBC’s
10th Day – 10 lunges each leg
11th Day – 11 Mt Climbers
12th Day – 12 Dive Bomber Merkins (seriously wish this was the last day)
13th Day – 13 Monkey Humpers
and finally, new for this year……
14th Day – 14 Diamond David Lee Roth BURPEESSSSS!!!!!!!!! (#crowdpleaser!)
The PAX pushed through to break a new record and added a 14th day to the workout. YHC promised that each additional day would be a different varrrriation of a burpee, the PAX replied with several choice words.
BOM – Gump
Devo – Paperboy: Be sure to continue the season of giving, being selfless and spending time with loved ones throughout the year.