• When: 12-18-12
  • QIC: Heartbreaker
  • The PAX: Sway, Stent, Padre, Mule (WB), Logo, Mel, Checker (WD), Heartbreaker (QIC), Mission, Tahj

I'm Gonna Bar-B-Q Your A** in Molassas

Heartbreaker took the Q and led the 10 faithful who posted on a bit of a MackBrowner in the early morning Columbia gloom.

The Thang:

Warmup jog around school with hard finish

SSH x30
Merkins x 15
LBC x15
High knees x20
Hit the Ground x10
Diamond Merkins x10

Jog to sideline:
Lunge walk half length, sprint to opposite side (twice)
CDD x10

Bunny Hops over planking pax x3

Hollywood Squares:
Jump ups x10
One leg lunges x10 each leg
Dips x15


Jog to Heartbreaker’s Brickpile (Mission takes over, blocks for all):
Block Curls x10
Incline Merkins  x10
Calf raises x20 each
Tricep extensions x10
Asstastic low planks x15

Cool down jog back to shovel flag



  • Heartbreaker had his first time as QIC and performed admirably. All was progressing smoothly until his cadence was interrupted by an obviously impaired driver who took out a telephone pole and ran the red light at the 5-way intersection in front of DHS, dragging the sparking street lamp with him. Dude on a moped had to lay it down to avoid a collision, and a smaller car spun when he slammed on brakes on the wet asphalt. Tahj – who had to un-ass early anyway for work – took off after the drunk in hot pursuit like Buford T. Justice chasing The Bandit, and with similar results. Fortunately no one was injured.
  • Not really sure about the name “asstastic low planks,” but that’s what Mission called them. The exercise was good, but the name needs some work. Mission, you probably should have left out the part about finding the exercise in Women’s Health magazine.
  • Checker took lame with a calf malfunction and may miss some days — very solid attendance ’til now, and it is believed this is NOT an Eau Claire Bailout.
  • At The Thicket after, Padre offered some much appreciated thoughts on God in the wake of the Connecticut evil. And, we learned Mule has been thanked often for his baking. Y’all should have been there…

0 thoughts on “I'm Gonna Bar-B-Q Your A** in Molassas”

  1. I can’t believe you can’t get behind the name Asstastic low planks. Urban dictionary has Asstastic as meaning Extremely cruel. It was also Vince Vaughn’s Home Alarm password in Couples Retreat. AND it works your core and gluts at the same time. Get well soon checker. Sway, can’t wait to see how the car chase turned out.

  2. The car chase bore no fruit. Tahj was able to contact CPD, but was unable to maintain visual contact with the offender and the trail was lost. As for “Asstastic Low Planks,” perhaps we need something that sounds — oh, I don’t know — less gay?

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