The rain was pouring and the lightning was poppin’ all around Cola-town at 5:45. YHC circled the Blatt for an extra close parking spot today, hoping to find a short commute to the steps for the #Smackdown meet up. When no ‘legal’ spots were to be found, I parked sideways in a handicap spot and ran over to the awaiting PAX; Myrtle and Big Worm. Questions had been raised on the GroupMe all day, and it was now time for answers.
YHC – ‘We gonna do this?’
Myrtle – ‘Yeah, you said you had a plan for the Bull street garage.’
<incredible lightning bolt, followed by two thunderclaps that sounded like a shotgun>
YHC – ‘OK, you want a ride up there?’
Myrtle/Big Worm – ‘Uhh, does Spanky like to fartsack? Yeah fool!’
So the three of us hopped in Piston (my ballin’ 12 year old Accord) and rolled up to the garage.
After moseying into down to the middle entrance of the Bull, YHC was ready to introduce the chumps to Boo’s layers of parking lot pain.
Conditions – Perfectly #EmilyDouglas inside the garage (ask a #Thunder PAX if you don’t know, or better yet, just post to #Thunder and find out)
The Thang:
After a short warmup of SSH’s, Slooooooooooowwwwwwwwww Squats and Merkins, and some Russian Twists; YHC got down to business.
Level 1:
Run up the first ramp to the top, then do 20 Squats, 15 Merkins, 10 Russian Twists, 5 Burpees.
Side note, for a guy as strapping and athletic as Myrtle, the dude hates Burpees. Call them early and often when he’s around.
Mosey to the flat side and line up at the 1st pillar:
-Sideways squat walk to the next pillar, do 10 squats.
Repeat for 5 pillars.
-Sideways plank walk to the next pillar, do 10 merkins.
Repeato 5 times
-Broad jump to the next pillar, do 5 burpees (Myrtle be hatin’ at this point)
Repeat that BS 5 times
Level 2:
At this point it seemed prudent to introduce the rarely called upon mid workout Mary, otherwise known as #MWM. Or Mary, Mary, why you crunchin’.
Do 20 each of the following: Russian Twists, LBC’s, Freddie Mercury’s, Situps.
Then do 15 each.
Then 10
Then 5
Kobe!
Now back to the ramps.
Backwards bearcrawl up the ramp, stopping at each pillar to do 5 Carolina Drydocks.
Now I must tell you, there are at least 1,000 pillars on the way up to the top of the ramp. We hit them all, but these dudes were whining like Boris when sees someone without cash.
Once everyone had hit the top, we ran the flat part and did our Squat/Merkin/Twist/Burpee circuit from before, which was just a breather for the final punishment.
Level 3:
I pulled this from my last Q at #Hammer. It was popular then, and it was popular today.
Squat 5 times, broad jump, 5 merkins.
Repeat all the way to the top of the ramp.
#crowdpleaser for sure!
With seconds to spare, the PAX completed the last level with aplomb. We all had dirty hands (since we all forgot gloves) and sweaty shirts, but we all came out better for our troubles.
Boo out!